Welcome to Miss A's Bootleg Paparazzi Agency - Mission 1 - MY IDIOTASTIC NEIGHBORS

*if you can't take a joke, you should exeunt right...about...now*

well bloggies, we've shot the ideas back and forth a few times...and i never thought i would actually be able to do it. but ALAS, i have gone on a mission to obtain pictures of my neighbors since i have shared so many stories about them with all of you. i'm sure you wondered what they may look like and today, you will have to wonder no more. let me say...this was a very difficult mission. it took me about 2 weeks to obtain shots of all of them due to the varying schedules and other antics that were going on. also, keep in mind, you will have to look closely cuz even tho i had a ball, i'm technically an amatuer. i had some camera malfunctions, hard angles, and difficulty getting position. the words may be small, but pull out your bifocals and/or magnifying glass (shawn :-P) so you can see better. next time, i'll have to get the high power equipment. now, if you do not know of my african neighbors (adam, olivia and tashi), it would behoove you to track back a little and read THIS before you continue. now, i should explain that i took these pictures as i observed my neighbors conducting their regular activities while i crouched in windows and hid in corners. up first.......adam and tashi (husband and wife)




i have not seen olivia (the sister) for quite some time. i believe she is held captive upstairs and is forced to oversee all de-furring, slicing and grilling of the wild animals adam captures. due to her current chore sentence, she is never seen outdoors, making it impossible to view her. use your imagination and envision her in your mind...she looks kinda like adam in a bad curly wig.


now onto the creme de la creme, your favorite blog neighbors and mine - pablo and margarita. again, if you are not familiar with them, take a moment to introduce yourself HERE and HERE before continuing. i'm telling you, it will help tie everything together.

anyhoos, i figured i should expound upon the fact that we all know margarita has returned since the infamous 4AM street fight incident. but let me share the deets since she's been back. she stayed away for ONE week. on her third day back, i was in my living room watching tv and i heard the familiar door slam and heavy footsteps. (grab the camera!) she stormed down the stairs screaming "I'M NOT GETTING HIGH FOR YOU MUTHA-FUCKA!! I'M NOT LOSING MY LIFE FOR NOBODY. I LIKE MY LIFE, MUTHA-FUCKA, SHIIIIIIT" what in fresh hell is going on? of course, i position myself to obtain some shots because she parked her funky ass on the front stairs which is right by my l.r. window. but as i was twitching and shifting in the window, i couldn't help but wonder...what the hell is she talking about? smoking to the point of dying? hmmmmm....i sincerely doubt that she is referring to weed, cuz who dies from that? so it had to be something serious like heroin or crack (or some new stuff i've never even heard of). my vote is for CRACK and i'll tell you why. (1) when i first moved in, pablo used to stand around outside and watch me intently. finally i spoke to him and once he opened his mouth i noticed, he had approximately 6-8 teeth. (2) pablo became stranger and stranger...he would stand across the street to look at me, he would sit on the front steps and watch me as i pulled in to park and STARE like he was retarded. (3) during the 4AM fight, i overheard him telling the cop that margie was stealing from him, hence his rage and insistence to throw her out-did she steal his stash? did she steal his crack savings? hmmmmmmmmm.... (4) pablo rents a garage but two times a day-EVERY DAY, he takes his very old (not vintage, just raggedy) mustang out and parks it on the street, puts it back in the garage, back on the street....then back to the garage. sometimes, his car will be five houses down on the other side of the street. why would he park so far away when he has a garage on the property? (5) not to mention, these people have NO shame. they fight like cats and dogs and don't care who hears them. i think drugs makes you fearless and careless, so i say-CRACK IT IS!!!

after i marinated on these thoughts, i got scared, cuz i'm like-these folks are crazy. they have their biz all in the streets and now i have CONFIRMATION that at least one of them is under the influence of something serious. as my mind continued to wander, margie stayed parked on the stairs for a minute. she even stayed and chatted up a passer-by (before pablo came outside). so i got some prime pics and they went a little something like this..............














(i actually felt sorry for her in this shot cuz she looks so stressed and confused.)








***on the update front, this past sunday, as i lay asleep-2:00 AM delivered margarita crying and screaming down the stairs. i only heard tidbits.....but i did hear the word "REHAB" (i don't know if she was suggesting it to him or referring to herself-DANG!) then she said (to pablo) "i only said that to see what you were about" pablo chases her down the stairs shouting "i'm about good family, dammit. that's what i'm about" margarita responds by saying " all i know is that i never want you to speak to me again ever." they took the rest of the argument outdoors, still within earshot. of course, i was fuming because, HELLO!! i have to go to work in the morning while pablo just has to play musical cars all day and she chain smokes. and WTF did pablo mean by his "good family" comment? did he mean that the family that fights together, lights together? if i'm a crackhead, you are too? the day margie sat on the stairs upset at his request to "get high", he eventually came outside and told her "you know it's my rules, right? you know that right?" she just stood by the car door and waited for him to unlock it. anyhoos, the next day, i went to the police station and to my dismay, there is really nothing that can be done to these fools. (not really surprised) the police never really seem to be able to "do anything" when you need them to and when you go about things "the right way" without taking the law into your own hands. so me, the quiet, extremely clean, always paying my rent on time, never hear a peep from neighbor has to just live with the crack head, always fighting, shouting in the streets and flaunting their drug habit neighbors until i move. only real option is to call the cops every time they fight and have them come out and hopefully witness their madness.

BWAAAAAAAHHHH HA HA.....AAHHHHHHH HA HA HA HAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!



she lurks in the closet, she hides in the trees
she'll post all your pics and report what she sees
she'll put you on blast and make fun of you
and let people see that you're such a big fool
whether crackhead or immigrant, or regular joe
no one is exempt, so make sure you know
to watch what you do and watch what you say
someone could be watching - it could be MISS A.


HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE PICS (& THE DRAMA) AND NOW YOU CAN MATCH FACES WITH THE NAMES SPRINKLED THROUGHOUT MY LITTLE OL' BLOG!!!