Guess who took a trip...God don't like UGLY!!!!!!!

HERE'S TO YOU!!! CHEERS, BEYATCH!!!!!!!!!!


well, i must say, for a brief moment, i was beginning to think that my extremely entertaining and idiotastic neighbors had received the memo that being a dumb-*ss was soooooooo out for 2006. BUT ALAS, i was blessed with a fresh, innovative, albeit hilarious rendition of "God don't like ugly." it would be foolish of me NOT to acknowledge the fact that my neighbors probably hate my guts and pray for the day that i move...and i, too, despise the very entrails that keep them energized enough to torment me and my nervous cat-baby. between cable-stealing, chain smoking pablo and margarita and the tennis shoveling, zebra-roasting adam, tashi, and olivia, i have really grown tired of their classless ways. but today's blog star would be that too-tight-jeans-from-rainbow-or-rave-clothing-store wearing MARGARITA!!

now, i have lodged many complaints against her and her husband (or commonlaw partner, whichever is appropriate)...but the majority of them are centered around noise. this woman is the loudest, skankiest, trashiest, most-in-need-of-an-etiquette-class chick i've ever seen. i will never know what makes her think EVERYONE wants to hear her conversations or that damn song "Gasolina" 76 times in a row every friday. and why she insists on screaming at pablo from the 3rd floor to the parking lot is just beyond me. i almost want to throw her one of those boost mobile phones (with instructions) just to cut down on all of the window talk. nonetheless, last week, she knocked at the main door for approx. 10 minutes at 3:45 AM because she must have forgotten her key. she then began to talk to herself about how pablo needs to get up and let her in, he makes her sick, %^$#*&%@%(, etc. she did this because i am on the first floor and she knows that i could hear her ranting thru my window very well. perhaps she expected me to get out of my warm bed to let her in-HA!! I SCOFF AT THEE!!! nonetheless, she took to screaming outside up to the 3rd floor...but pablo was sound asleep. finally she left (to go to a pay phone i assume) and came back to a hasty pablo scurrying down the stairs. well, you know i had to complain about that instance because i'm like-look, i do not work at the local bodega, or at the closest off-ramp...i have a job at which i work long hours each day-so these antics in the middle of the night are unacceptable. these people have no respect or courtesy for the other tenants, etc. this was probably complaint # 34 from me against them.

needless to say, they have an attitude now and i have noticed that margarita has taken to new lows trying to annoy me. she and pablo have to walk up 3 flights of stairs to get to their place. and she has decided to start RUNNING up the stairs-therefore making a lot of noise. see, margarita is a thick-ums (which is her prerogative...but she need NOT be running). so the sound of her running up & down these stairs is comparable to the sound of a buffalo AND a wilderbeast racing to the slop-barrel...like a steam engine roaring thru grand central station...like 1,000 bricks falling from the top of the empire state building. she does this because it is a way for her to bother me, but in a slick and somewhat cunning way. if i did complain, she could play the "thats just how i walk, is she cracking on my weight?" card. but we both know what she's doing...and it all started after that fateful morning at 3:45AM.

well, yesterday, she ran up and down, down and up all day long. i was going bonkers and she was working my last nerve....when all of the sudden......BOOM BOOM BOOM, CRASH, BLAM!!! "OH-HAY-SOOS CHRISTO!!!!!!!!!!!! AY CARAMBA!!!!!!!!!!! YOUCH!!!!!!!!" BOOM, BAM, CA-RASH!!!!! Margarita took a nasty spill down the last flight of stairs right by my apartment.

oh lord have mussy!!!!!!!!! i must have wet myself at the thought....so i peeked out to witness all of the commotion and there lay margarita, left leg extended, right leg bent under her big *ss, head on the banister and too-tight-jeans split in the middle exposing her crusty mesh draws. her ponytail was all disshelved and looked like a bird had gotten loose in it...face red from embarrassment as she tried to laugh it off.

the nice person in me said-are you ok? and the demon in her persed her lips and said thru tight lips "i fine, mami" as she rolled her eyes. i walked away saying "God don't like ugly, stop running." then i went inside and stood right on the other side of the door and laughed so hard that the people across the street heard me.

ain't it funny that when you go out of your way to hurt, annoy, or wrong someone else, you usually get bit in the *ss!!!!!!!!!!! lesson learned, margarita. sweet justice
ONE POINT, MISS A.
NEGATIVE 35 MARGIE & PAB!!!!!!